I’ve decided that from now on when young folks ask me for writing career advice, I am just going to send them Britney Spears’ new single:

I’m joking, mostly, of course. Writing is quite unlikely to get you a Maserati. Writing is an even worse way to look hot in a bikini. But most successful writers I know simply worked the hardest, end of story. One of my most prized compliments of my reasonably successful book release this summer was when Jami Attenberg said I was “one of the hardest workers” she knows.

You want a bestseller? You better work, bitch.